Solo traveling - Some perspectives

Full disclosure – I didn’t see the Buckingham palace, didn’t go up the London eye or take a cruise down the Thames, on my 10-day trip to the UK.

Why? So, here’s the best thing about being a solo traveller – you get to do just exactly what you want to do – your time, your interests, your schedules.  

I’ve often been asked about why I travel solo and if I don’t miss company and how safe it is. I started soloing because I did not find like minded folks to travel with. I like off-beat places, history, museums, old forts, dilapidated old structures, cultural interests– especially from a socio aspect. At least for me, this is one of the main reasons. So, my first trip was to McLeod Ganj (abode of the Dalai lama); something just perked my interest about that place.  Was a tad scary but I ended up really enjoying it, that soloing has become my go to travel mode.

I guess the big difference is whether you’re a traveller or a tourist or on a holiday. I don’t consider any of my trips to be holidays; they are experiences. When you travel, it's more about the journey than the destination. You don’t follow the 10 best things to see or do in a place – I mean sure, you do some of them, but its perfectly fine to not do them if you have no interest in them.

When you go off the beaten path, you discover nuggets and treasures that one would never find in any travel guide or could have planned in advance.

Let me list some of my experiences – a film festival (by Tibetan diaspora) at Mcleodganj, a lunch invite to the village headman’s house in Nagaland (I might have ended up being part of the menu, as this was at the village of the supposed fearsome headhunter tribe. Lol. They turned out to be the sweetest people I have met), an impromptu concert by a duo singing a folk Rajasthani song, performed in a story narration style in Bhuj (the two were just bantering among themselves, and when I requested if I could take a video, gave me a 15 minute performance), a special tour in Kutch to the house of an artist who practiced the unique Rogan art (there’s just half a dozen families in the world practicing this art), a 1 hour discussion with a cab driver in Seoul who gave me such insights into Korea, their people, the culture, lifestyle, the aspirations of youth, the socio economic scenario – something I could have maybe looked up and read, but got biased views), an art show – crown to couture – at the Kensington palace, that showed how women – right from 17c queens to modern artists at the met gala - used attire to make political or powerful statements, a pub (which used to be a prison) under the tower of London, still displaying vignettes of the gory bygone times (the tower area used to the ‘adda’ of bootleggers, thugs and prostitutes), a walk along the Thames (the queen’s walk) with a display of unique and quirky art installations by artists who call themselves eco warriors, a quiet little book shop specialising in just cook books, some old and rare (and this is on the same lane as the famous book shop – Notting Hill (of the movie fame, which everyone visits), a museum specialising in brands (even old time Londoners were not aware of this), a beautiful winding walkway through part forest in Yuksom, Sikkim… I’m sure there are more. But my point is, when you are on your own, you end up finding things experiences that you never planned on, which are quirky, interesting and giving unique insights and perspectives about a place and its people. 

  

Being a woman solo traveller, there is an aspect of safety to be considered. Fingers crossed, I have not come across any negative experiences thus far, even when I have ventured completely off-beat and off season. That both emboldens me to explore more but also makes me cautious to ensure that I continue to stay safe. One is more aware and instinctive when travelling alone. I have actually found people to be more friendly and helpful when they know you are travelling alone, contrary to popular belief. One needs to practice this strange dichotomy of being open and trusting while at the same time being cautious (but not wary) of people, places and experiences.  Successfully navigating a totally unknown place can be hugely liberating, a confidence booster, and more importantly an immense learning experience.

Soloing often has a perception of just picking up a backpack and just going somewhere. It actually involves a lot of planning (most of it well before you actually embark on one). I prefer to do all my bookings – travel, stay etc. by myself; that is, I don’t use any travel consultants or agents.  This again gives one the flexibility to pick what suits you, but also has an element of not following the tried and tested. Be open for some amazing experiences, or not so very - it could go either ways.  I usually do my own travel bookings – to and fro and the stay – what I do once I get there is usually open. I prefer to avoid large hotel chains for stay – again, this can be a trade off between getting something professional and efficient (but cold and standard) and the charm of something homely and authentic.  For me this is part of the whole experience and I have found some gems – Chonor house in McLeod Ganj is actually a guest house that is run by the main temple (next to Dalai Lama’s residence). It has just 6/7 rooms, but each room is a store house of art – every room is luxuriously fitted and has a theme. The food is simple and basic but cooked with care and love by people working with the temple. Deewanji Ni Haveli is a 300-year-old meticulously restored heritage home in old Ahmedabad, complete with a stepwell inside the house.  No intercoms to order your morning coffee – one just opens a jharoka overlooking the courtyard below and calls out for it😊. I must confess, I was initially a bit wary, as it is situated amidst a narrow gully in a crowded marketplace, and the walls and doors so thick that one cannot hear any noise from outside and vice versa.  I was travelling off season and was the only guest in that place. Scary, but I was treated like a royalty in my own haveli. Had a similar experience at Bhuj House, yet another 2/300-year-old Parsi manor. Again, being the only guest, even Imli the kitten treated me like her own and would come into my room to give me company. The staff would ask me what I wanted for breakfast or dinner and prepare to my liking.

 Alone or lonely – do I miss company?  Often, it’s after a long day and back in the room, and most places I stay in do does not have a TV. Or going into a restaurant to eat alone.  Or sometimes, yes, it would be great to share an experience with someone.  There are trade-offs, but well, so does life.  And I have chosen the road less travelled, and more often than not, it has been extremely rewarding.    Try it once, is my advice…you never know if you enjoy it unless you do.